OPEN MOUTH, INSERT FOOT

I’m writing this blog today because over the past couple weeks a few of my friends have fallen victim to some big mouth mistakes. I’m calling them mistakes because I don’t believe people are trying to be offensive when they say some of the dumb shit that they say. So, I thought maybe we could all use a refresher course on how to not be an asshole.

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#1. Mind your own uterus. Do not congratulate someone on their pregnancy unless you know for sure they are pregnant. Instances when you know for sure; they have announced their pregnancy or the baby is crowning. Continue reading

Spring Fashion- back to the 90’s

Hey ladies,

I am so sick of this cold ass weather I could die. I’m done buying sweaters for the year, moving on. So I’ve been scouring around, looking at what’s coming this spring. The 90’s are back in a BIG way you guys. Every single one of these looks could be found in any re-run of Saved by the Bell. I’m dying to hear what you are excited to see is back. I also want to hear which of these is making you cringe.

Let’s start with…

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Today, I can breathe again.

For those of you who have not read our past stories, you can read them here.

when you get knocked down- part 1
when you get knocked down – part 2
when you get knocked down part 3

Developmental delays and speech delays are a real problem. Now that we are moving forward on our own journey, I hope to shed some light on this issue. If you are just joining our story, please understand that we know how fortunate we are in comparison to other parents and children on a path much more difficult than our own.  

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Hearing that your child is average is not something that throws most parents into happy tears.

A year ago, my husband and I left the “most” parents club.

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Gifts that don’t suck

The holiday season can be so daunting when it comes to gift giving. I like to give thoughtful gifts, but also something that is useful. Most of the gifts here are things friends and family have given me throughout the years. Verified awesome stuff that didn’t go to the back of my closet and die. So here we go.

gifts

YETI– When my husband told me he was going to spend $30 on a travel mug, I damn near lost my mind. However, I was dead wrong. YETI is amazing at keeping things cold or hot, totally worth it. This is an awesome gift because lots of people won’t splurge on something like this for themselves, but they will love it. The Yeti Rambler is my personal favorite. Perfect for the coffee addict in your life.

yeti

 

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A Letter to my First Born Child

My Dear Olive,

I was 26 and not married when I found out I was going to be your mom. I must have taken 100 pregnancy tests before I believed you were true. Your daddy was excited right away, and I thought he must be crazy. What a huge responsibility had been gifted to us and I was worried. I’m just being honest here, I was scared shit-less!

 

The first time I saw your little heart beat on the ultrasound screen is the last time I ever felt alone. As you grew in my belly, I talked to you all the time. People would remark on how often I held my belly. It was some weird instinct so you would know I was there. All of the hormones and emotions were overwhelming. The most overwhelming feeling was love.

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The Weight Loss Conspiracy

I have a confession to make. I’ve been a little obsessed with my diet and weight loss lately. No matter what I seem to do, this last 10lbs of baby weight won’t come off. OK, so I should probably stop calling it baby weight, since my baby will be 3 this winter. Whatever it is, it’s driving me nuts and pissing me off. Just to add insult to injury, there is no good logic here. I’m an active person. I don’t eat like shit (mostly). I drink like 3 gallons of water a day. What the hell you guys? I know I’m not alone in this boat, and that helps, but really what gives? I got to thinking about it, and I think I have figured it out. Follow me here ladies;

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The Pregnant Terrorist

One of my favorite things about my life is never knowing what kind of text or email I’m going to wake up to. Sometimes it’s a mucus plug, sometimes it’s a breastfeeding issue, a picture of a baby rash, etc. I never know what my phone will reveal before my first cup of coffee, and I love it. This morning it was a few texts from one of my pregnant besties. The story of how she had just been completely fondled by the TSA, trying to get on her flight for a work trip.

TSA

I totally must have forgotten to brief her on “flying pregnant” protocol. My family and I travel a lot, so I wrote “When Babies Fly”, to humorously review traveling with kids. Today, the prequel, I bring you The Pregnant Terrorist.

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