Fa – La – La – Losing My Mind

This is my first year with one kid in grade school and one in pre-school. I knew this year was going to be a bit of a juggling act, especially since I put the girls in schools 20 mins away from each other. I thought that was going to be my greatest challenge this year, boy was I wrong.

Can we just talk about the extra stuff? You know the non-educational “special” events and “extras”. The spirit days, and the fun runs, and crazy sock day. I’m not super old, OK. We had that stuff when I was in school. It occurred once a year, and it was fun. I consider myself a pretty involved parent, and I like all the fun little programs, but this shit has become a full-time job. Continue reading

1st Day of Preschool Blues

My Dear Eva Diva

I thought sending your sister to kindergarten was hard, but wow. This is my hardest day. O my little baby. From the second I found out you were in my belly until today, I’ve been with you, protecting you. I’ve been crying over you. I’ve been in love with you. I thank god for our rough road. If it hadn’t of been so rough, who knows what our bond would look like. But it was, and you were the baby I almost lost. You are my miracle, you are my fighter. You are my Eva Diva. You are the girl I prayed harder for than I have ever prayed in my life. You are my perfect blue-eyed angel meant to change me forever, and you did, and you still do. Continue reading

The 5 Stages of Summer Vacation

I don’t know about you guys, but I am knee deep in summer vacation. By summer vacation, I mean longer days, a messier house, more chores, and YES, bored children. I was totally looking forward to this “relaxed”, unscheduled, easy-breezy time with my sweet babes. Who can relate to these 5 stages of summer?

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  1. Excitement – usually occurs around April / May.  The feeling of freedom is so close you can almost taste it. No more rushed mornings, packing lunches and backpacks. No more outfit picking. Screw it, just wear what you had on yesterday. Three months of freedom from class parties and special school days. I’m not brushing your hair, I’m not even brushing my hair! Sweet, sweet summer, please hurry.

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Weird Shit Moms Say

Before I became a mother none of these phrases would have come out of my mouth. Well, maybe like one or two but definitely not one a regular basis. Now I say this shit every day, usually multiple times a day. Sometimes when I hear myself I think “what the fuck happened to my life?” I’m sure you moms and dads out there can relate. Here are my weirdest:

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5 Things Mom Lies About Daily

ARTWORK – Yes, I love it. Of course, I see exactly what it is. It’s wonderful, I’ll keep it forever. You are an amazing artist!

Truth is, with the exception of the uterus painting below, I’m usually very confused by my kid’s artwork. Yes, I love it, but like 50 paintings or color pages a week is too many too keep. I’m throwing most of it away once you go to sleep baby.

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Mom’s I just CAN’T with…

Here are a few mom’s I just can’t be friends with. I like meeting new people and I try to be kind to everyone. However, making “mom friends” is tough, even for the super social. I consider myself a “cut your losses” kind of lady. I approach a potential friend and say “Hi I’m Sarah, would you like to drink wine and bitch about our kids”? If the answer is no, that’s OK. I just like to know where I stand. Before I developed this intense screening process for potential friends, I met the ladies below. You may know some of these gals as well.

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